Where those labels are seemingly incongruous is where our complicated, loving relationship lives As my trans heartthrob tells me: “TERFs don’t have space for the complexities and nuances of individuals. TERF ideology is based on fear, pain and the desire to ‘other’. And I have no interest in defining myself by other people’s pain.” My lesbianism is inclusive; it celebrates gender diversity as much as it celebrates women; it celebrates different expressions of sapphic love and attraction; it celebrates camaraderie and a shared history with queer people of all genders. It celebrates its own queerness. M y attraction to Amelia is queer, as theirs is to me: there are sapphic elements to our relationship, there is a playful balance of masculine, feminine, androgynous and pure chaotic energies “Labels develop with time and safety,” my stunning partner and co-pet-parent reflects. “Non-binary is the best descriptor for me, and lesbian is the best descriptor for you.